Slime

Slime has recorded 1056 kills across 29 matches in the Haven Fragging Facility, winning 19 of them. His preferred instrument of persuasion is the .357 Magnum, responsible for 394 recorded kills. All of his currently recorded matches fall within the last seven days, where he has posted 1056 kills against 283 deaths for a K/D of 3.73. The respawn system has been advised not to make evening plans.

Slime's most persistent human nuisance over the last seven days has been Sir Digby, who has killed him 93 times. Slime has replied 107 times, so Sir Digby's complaint has been received but not upheld. Slime has also triggered the Comeuppance Protocol once after reaching the required winning streak. The bots formally requested adult supervision. He has also managed 38 suicides, demonstrating that the opposition does not always need to get involved. dm_runoff has been particularly hospitable, yielding 3 wins from 5 recorded appearances.

Comeuppance has now moved from emergency procedure to something resembling a recurring appointment for Slime. The .357 Magnum remains Slime's preferred method of settling disagreements, with 394 recorded kills so far. The Bricklin has been informed that, statistically, its owner is currently the more reliable high-performance machine.